Q: What does a bored English teacher do on a lazy Saturday in December?
A: Open an online boutique for semicolon enthusiasts.
Yes, it’s come to this. I’ve opened an online shop called The Semicolony, a one-stop shopping destination for all of your semicolon needs. Assuming, of course, your semicolon needs consist entirely of tee shirts, mouse pads, posters, mugs, and flasks emblazoned with the following bit of wit that I came up with all by myself (though I wouldn’t be surprised if dozens of other people have also already come up with the same piece of wit all by themselves as well):
So come on down to The Semicolony today and pick up a gift for the English teacher, copy editor, punctuation lover, grammar fiend, or errant pedant in your life.
And remember: I’m not winking; I’m punctuating.